I am currently guarding our volvo from my perch atop the balcony attached to the loft space that I am in. Or rather, outside of.

So far, there has been one sighting of a suspicious cat, whom I am certain was lurking near said vehicle with nefarious plans.

This is why we do not give cats driver's licenses. Were a cat to be allowed to operate a motor vehicle, I am fairly certain that nothing good would come of the privilege. In fact, I would even (well, I guess I am even) go/going so far as to say that I have firm convictions regarding the nature of the activities cats would engage in were they allowed to drive.

However, I must also take a moment to consider that from a purely objective perspective, my assumptions about feline behavior in regards to operating motor vehicles cannot be substantiated by any physical evidence, or even hypothetical prognostications.

Which in turn forces me to acknowledge another fact worthy of consideration, said fact being that there is a veritable cornucopia of physical evidence and statistical analytics which prove that humans are virtually undeniably prone to engaging in various nefarious activities with the aid of state issued licenses to drive all manners of motor vehicles.

In conclusion, I must concede that my assumtions about the dangers of cats being awarded the permission to drive cars is, at best, unfounded and at worst, virtually irrelevant when compared to the dangers of humans being granted the same permission.

That being said, I would like to humbly propose that we at least give a cat a chance to prove me wrong, by way of replacing all human taxi cab drivers with feline taxi cab drivers. This would allow for a conclusive study to resolve the completely irrelevant question of which of the the two species is less dangerous when operating motor vehicles.

Thank you.